Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Train up a child

Having kids and training them in the way they should go is a lot harder than I thought it would be.  When I was single, I observed the way my friends and family would discipline and train their kids and I liked some things and didn't agree with others.  I formed some ideas on how I would do it...one day.  Well, "one day" has come, and I'll just confess...I don't think anything fully prepared me.  You can't predict the way you're going to feel when your child decides to run the opposite direction when you tell him or her to come to you.  You may be sleep deprived, or you may have had a rough week, a headache...and that one little act of defiance may push you over the edge.  I've been there.  For sure!  Adding more kids in the mix just gives you extra opportunities to see these acts...and practice your responses.  

Lately I've actually been thinking a lot about my responses.  Reading Ann Voskamp's "One Thousand Gifts" helped me to stop and think about what is the root issue of my child's disobedience.  Sin, for me, is the obvious answer.  My little ones need God's Word and they need our help in training them in the right direction, because Jesus can change their heart.  For me to blow up, loose my cool, and not be disciplined myself while training them is probably not the best.  It's so hard not to do that, though.  I need Jesus to help me and I KNOW that if I'm repeating His words to my kids on a regular basis, it's going to change me, too.

I've talked to a few friends and asked for prayer and direction in facing some new, challenging child training issues.  God's Word is definitely the direction I want to go with this...in a more effective way.  A wise lady in my church recommended this tool from "Doorposts" and I'm really excited about it.  It's called an "If-Then" chart.  Here is the link to it.  
It basically has three columns, and you have an offense on the left side, scripture in the middle that goes along with it, and on the right side you can write in what type of discipline you want to use.  So when your child does one of those offenses, you can take them right to the chart and do the discipline.  I think it will help take the frustration out of some of the issues we have. Doorposts also makes a "Blessing Chart" that helps encourage your kids and offer rewards for behavior that honors the Lord and encourages others.  Their website has all sorts of resouces that help with organizing household chores, teaching stewardship, and more.  Definitely worth checking out!

Another tool I ran across tonight while checking out some blogs was the Child Training Bible.  I had to watch the tutorial on their site to really understand what it was, but it basically uses tabs and highlighters to mark different verses in the Bible that reference different discipline/training issues. 


The creators of it explained that they wanted to use Bible verses with their child training, but either couldn't think of them right off hand or didn't know the verse, so they created something that would help get to it right away and address the specific issue.  Their resource cards also give some discussion questions to go along with it.  I can totally relate to what these parents were saying...because I feel the same way.  The great thing is that it's obvious this family wants to take their kids...and those who purchase this resource...back to the Gospel.  It's all about learning what Jesus did for us on the cross and showing that the Bible really does relate to everyday life and struggles.  Another thing I love about is the price!  Both the Child Training Bible cards and the "If-Then" chart are less than $10 each.

There are lots of great ideas for training your children...and more than enough books on the subject.  I like to read, but sometimes reading book after book on kid raising just overwhelms me and sometimes confuses me.  I like these tools because they are broken down and just go right back to the Word.  I want my kids to have God's Word in their heart and I honestly need to focus on His Word, too...and take some of the emotion out of the situation.

Are there any resources or tools that you've found helpful?  I'm open to suggestions!  : )  Child training is tough.  Pray for me...and let me know how I can pray for you!

2 comments:

The Sheffields said...

Neat resources! Have you read Ginger Plowman's "Don't Make Me Count to Three!"? It's very good and there's a calendar style pamphlet called "Wise Words for Mom" that helps mom use Scripture verses for particular circumstances when disciplining her child(ren). They are both super helpful resources!

The Great Adventure said...

I've heard of the "Don't Make Me Count to Three!" book but haven't read it. I will definitely check out the pamphlet thing...I like things that are visual and kind of summarize the details. I've also heard of the Pearl family. Several of my friends use their stuff and I just remembered that they really liked it. Their website is http://nogreaterjoy.org/.